Anon

I wrote a post a few years ago titled "Anonymous." A just reread it, and I must admit, I have drastically changed my opinions of the situation. I'm not saying that I was wrong before, I'm just saying that at the time, I hadn't discovered the power of Anonymous, or Anon as I know him now. Here's the older article:

Anonymous

So here's my new opinions. Anon is an amazing creature. He has more power than anyone I have ever known. His reach extends farther than any political leader, his influence felt everywhere. He has the power to open doors that no one else can open, and he is not confined by the rules of the world. He breaks laws, he cheats the system, and most of all, he is never held accountable for his actions. Anon is, for lack of a better explanation, the God of the Internet.

But why do I know this? Unfortunately, in order to explain myself, I'm going to have to break the first rule of Fight Club. I discovered the power of Anon when I came to the End of the Internet. It was here that Anon introduced himself to me by calling me a "fucking newfag" and generally breaking my unbreakable morale. Anon lives and thrives here, at the end of the internet, where common sense and intelligence goes to either die, or be born in secret and smuggled into existence before someone notices it and attempts to slaughter it. His home is 4Chan, and he thrives in /b/.

When Apple's stock crashed thanks to rumours that Steve Jobs had died, that was Anon. He managed to post so often that CNN believed Steve to be dead, and posted a story on it. Apple's stock dropped, and the mistake was realized. When that girl threw puppies into a river, it was Anon who found her phone number, her name, her facebook, her address, her family's addresses, and every other shred of personal information about her allowing the police to arrest her. And whenever anyone needs to find out who someone is, a quick post to /b/ gets you her name, facebook, phone number, AIM, MSN, email, etc. with one quick reply from Anon.

He isn't all-powerful though. Anon is lazy. He loves to help find people, and he loves to cause trouble, but more than anything else, he loves to do nothing. His usual responses are ones of neglect and hate. He is racist, derogatory, and generally an asshole. He would rather write "Penis" thirty times than answer a question.

Despite his setbacks, though, I have grown to love Anon. I respect him. He is a powerful creature, and I am proud to see him commenting on things I write. He's a good man, as terrible as he may be.