No Bungee for You!

I always am amused by people who get mad at things that are so clearly their own fault. I bring this up because the other day, when I was crossing campus to go to my Shakespeare The Early Plays class, I overheard a fat girl talking to some of her friends about an "asshole who wouldn't let her ride the bungee ride in Six Flags." After hearing this, I actually came to a complete halt, took a seat in a chair not too far away from her, and listened in. I ended up being almost ten minutes late for class, but I think it was worth it. Allow me to set the stage before I tell the story:

This woman was enormous. We're not talking a little overweight, we're talking so overweight I'm surprised she doesn't have a heart attack just standing up and walking to the door. She was a ball, from top to bottom. One little push would probably send her rolling off in any odd direction. She was with a number of extremely skinny girls, all of them who seemed to be very sympathetic of the woman's situation. On any normal day, I would by sympathetic also. I know that Obesity is a very common and very threatening illness, and a lot of the time it cannot be helped. There is so much evidence that it is genetic it's becoming difficult to fully blame the individual for their situation. However, I do believe there is a point where a poor situation can become your own fault. This girl was at that point. She had in her hand a monster bag of Cheeto's, on the table she had a basket of fried chicken, and then a two liter bottle of coke. I kid you not. So, my respect for her was low. Now, for the story.

There she was, shoveling Cheeto's into her mouth and sipping on her Coke straight from the bottle (in which she had a straw which kept falling down into the neck and vanishing into the black abyss that was the remnants of Coke she had not yet consumed). She was yelling, literally yelling, as if the skinny girls in front of her, all of whom were eying up the food with immense desire, couldn't hear her unless she screamed at the top of her lungs. So, fat girl kept on yelling, turning the heads of many passers by, her scream rivaling that of a pack of wild and starving wolves. I'll try to quote as best I can what I heard.

Fat Girl: And so I went to get on the Bungee ride, and the guy working it said I couldn't ride it because I was too heavy! Can you believe that?

Skinny Girl 1: That's awful.

Fat Girl: Yea, so I told him he shouldn't offer the ride if not everyone can ride it. Then guess what? He had the nerve to tell me that little kids couldn't ride it either. The ride wasn't built for everyone, and he was 'sorry' that I wasn't able to go on. It was 'for my own safety'.

Skinny Girl 2: What an asshole

Fat Girl: I know! I told him to go fuck himself, and I was never coming back here again, and none of my friends would be either!

I was laughing, of course. I think Skinny Girl 3, who said nothing during this entire rant of Fat Girl, knew exactly what I was laughing at because she kept glancing over at me and looking embarrassed. Really, if Fat Girl wanted to ride the bungee thing so badly, maybe instead of the Cheeto's and Chicken, she should be snacking on carrot sticks.

But hey, what do I know, I'm as skinny as a twig. It's grand being me!