Bad Luck

Superstition is a funny thing, especially for those of us who are not superstitious. I don't doubt for even a second that superstition, for those who believe in it, is a terrible terrible burden, but for the rest of us it's rather comical.

I personally have some questions regarding the whole "bad luck" part of the superstitious nature. For example, the whole "putting up an umbrella in a house" thing. Who decided this and why? It's an umbrella. A man made object that is designed, built, and tested under a roof. I just don't see how opening an umbrella inside can bring me bad luck. Also, breaking a mirror. Why do I get punished for breaking my own reflection, but if I drop a glass bottle (which is basically the same exact material, except a mirror has a reflective sheet over it) I am not punished in the least. The walking underneath ladders thing I understand. Handymen and painters up on ladders carry some dangerous tools, and I can just see a superstitious idiot walking along under a ladder and a paint can falls on his head, to which he immediately exclaims: "It must be bad luck walking under ladders!" No, you moron, it's just dangerous. Don't do it.

I've been testing this bad luck theory. I call it a theory, but it really isn't is it. If anything, it's a hypothesis. One that has been proven false. See, the way the scientific method works is a hypothesis must be submitted to many of the same tests. If it then succeeds in them all (or most, because we must make room for human error), then the hypothesis is elevated to a theory. This bad luck hypothesis has yet to overcome all of the tests. In fact, from what I've noticed about it, the end result is entirely based on what you believed before you went into the test to begin with. We need a neutral party to test just how much bad luck you get by breaking a mirror.

I say we use toddlers. Let's put them in a room full of hammers, mirrors, and holes. Then we'll see what happens. If they can navigate the mirror room without falling in holes after they break a mirror, then obviously, the bad luck hypothesis is false. If they all fall in holes after breaking mirrors, but didn't fall in holes before, then I'd say it's true. If they just have no rhyme or reason as to when they fall into holes and when they don't, the test is inconclusive, and we'll have to just admit it's all in our heads.

Come now, we have work to do! Off to find toddlers!