Sand

Sand has one purpose on this planet; to piss you off. No matter where it is, no matter what it's doing, no matter if it exists in air, water, or rock; sand exists only to piss you off. A single grain of sand can do unthinkable damage. For instance, it can get in your eye and cause unbearable pain, you could get it stuck under a nail and have that constant feeling of something bothering you that is entirely unreachable, or it could even get in your ear and cause that strange tingling and muffled sound sensation that one receives whenever their auditory canal is blocked.

That's not even the half of it. Sand doesn't just travel alone. Oh no. Sand travels in swarms. At beaches, in deserts, construction zones; really at any dry area you'll find sand, and lots of it. This is where it gets you. It aims for your shoes, more directly for your socks, and in it goes, lodging its self between the fabric of your socks so that you can always feel it, no matter what you do. It will then proceed to sit in the sock for day after day, wash after wash. The only way to kill the sand all together is to throw the sock away. Of course, by this time the shoes you were wearing are now filled with sand also, and as soon as you slip a new pair of socks into those shoes they immediately assimilate the remaining sand. Then you have to throw out another pair of socks.

Sand also targets the areas of your body one prefers to keep moderately private. It seems to be attracted to these regions for some reason. It loves to just get up in your swimsuit and sit there, unmoving and unyielding. It'll just sit there and bug you all day long, drive you so insane you feel you may actually hurt someone or something if you can't find a way to get the sand out from inside your shorts. Puppy dogs and kitty cats beware during this form of sand invasion; cuteness is no saving grace.

Then, once it has finished infiltrating your shorts and your socks, the sand targets your hair. For days after any visit to a sandy area, you will always find tiny grains of sand in the bottom of your shower. Always. It's like the grains reproduce on your scalp. It's awful.

Sand is evil, and so are places that allow it to gather in large numbers. Beaches, deserts, and dust bowls; I curse you.