Thursday, May 19, 2011
Site Moving
I'm moving to WordPress. Here's the new Mitchener Mind: http://mitchenermind.wordpress.com
Friday, February 25, 2011
AT&T Fail
I have been an AT&T wireless customer now since they merged with Cingular way back when. I believe I spent a few months as a Verizon customer in the middle of that, but it was because AT&T started cheating on me with other cell towers and I couldn't get signal in my apartments. So, as I lay in bed at night thinking about where AT&T had gone, I decided it was time for me to get back at her and just go start a new relationship with a better wireless company. It turned out my plans to make AT&T, my true love, jealous worked because shortly after I had joined Verizon AT&T pulled me back with a free phone, paid for my cancellation with Verizon, and gave me some pretty cheap rates. I came back reluctantly, but secretly I was happy to be back in the warm embrace of my beloved AT&T.
Then, a few days ago, I was introduced to AT&T's Jeff. I called Jeff because I needed to activate the Blackberry network on my phone. I had just gotten a Blackberry and wanted to step away form my iPhone, just testing the waters with some new products, but I couldn't use data on my phone until I had informed AT&T of the transition. So, like any good user would, I quickly grabbed my phone and called 611 for customer support. They were quick enough to answer, a few minutes on hold at most, followed by my introduction to Jeff. Here's what happened:
Jeff: Thank you for calling AT&T, my name is Jeff and I'm going to provide you with the very best customer service you've experienced.
--NOTE-- Jeff and I are already off to a bad start at this point. Claiming to be providing me the very best customer support I've ever had? I don't know about that-- I mean I have an account with Netflix, and they're pretty amazing. So thanks to Jeff's blatant lie, we were already not going to get along. I mean, how could we? Jeff's a liar, and I don't trust liars at all.
Me: We'll see, Jeff.
Jeff: Are you calling from number XXX-XXX-XXXX?
Me: Yes, that's correct.
Jeff: And you're name?
Me: James Mitchener, spelled M-I-T-C-H-E-N-E-R
Jeff: Alright Mr. Mitchener, who is the administrator on the account?
Me: Me, My brother, Robert Mitchener, and my mother, Lynn Mitchener.
Jeff: Great. Can I have the last 4 digits of the social security number?
Me: Which one, we're all administrators, we can all alter this account, so which one of our socials would you like? Mine?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: (long pause) I'm sorry?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: What do you mean you can't answer that question, Jeff? You want me to give you a social security number, but you won't tell me whose social security number you want?
Jeff: I'm sorry, sir. I can't give you that information.
Me: What information, Jeff? You can't tell me which name, all of which I already told you, you want a Social for? See, the thing is Jeff, I know all these socials, so I can give you any of them you want. However, I'm not going to just guess which one because frankly I don't trust you enough to start spitting out random socials that might not be on file. Now, whose social do you want?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: Alright, Jeff, there are 11 planets in the solar system (based on that Pluto thing and the inclusion of the new planets), I'm thinking of one. Tell me its circumference.
Jeff: I'm sorry?
Me: Answer my question Jeff, or is that too hard because I haven't bothered to tell you which planet I am interested in? Now tell me, which person's social do you want? Robert Mitchener? James Mitchener? Lynn Mitchener? Tell me Jeff. Which one?
Jeff: I can't answer that.
Me: Alright Jeff, I'm going to call back later, and hopefully I'll get to talk to someone who isn't a moron.
--- END ---
I haven't called back. I just can't bring myself to deal with the level of stupid that emanated from that office. I fear that Jeff might have actually infected everyone else at AT&T, and if I call, I could suffer from phone-transmitted-retardation. I'm just going to play it safe and switch to T-Mobile.
Then, a few days ago, I was introduced to AT&T's Jeff. I called Jeff because I needed to activate the Blackberry network on my phone. I had just gotten a Blackberry and wanted to step away form my iPhone, just testing the waters with some new products, but I couldn't use data on my phone until I had informed AT&T of the transition. So, like any good user would, I quickly grabbed my phone and called 611 for customer support. They were quick enough to answer, a few minutes on hold at most, followed by my introduction to Jeff. Here's what happened:
Jeff: Thank you for calling AT&T, my name is Jeff and I'm going to provide you with the very best customer service you've experienced.
--NOTE-- Jeff and I are already off to a bad start at this point. Claiming to be providing me the very best customer support I've ever had? I don't know about that-- I mean I have an account with Netflix, and they're pretty amazing. So thanks to Jeff's blatant lie, we were already not going to get along. I mean, how could we? Jeff's a liar, and I don't trust liars at all.
Me: We'll see, Jeff.
Jeff: Are you calling from number XXX-XXX-XXXX?
Me: Yes, that's correct.
Jeff: And you're name?
Me: James Mitchener, spelled M-I-T-C-H-E-N-E-R
Jeff: Alright Mr. Mitchener, who is the administrator on the account?
Me: Me, My brother, Robert Mitchener, and my mother, Lynn Mitchener.
Jeff: Great. Can I have the last 4 digits of the social security number?
Me: Which one, we're all administrators, we can all alter this account, so which one of our socials would you like? Mine?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: (long pause) I'm sorry?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: What do you mean you can't answer that question, Jeff? You want me to give you a social security number, but you won't tell me whose social security number you want?
Jeff: I'm sorry, sir. I can't give you that information.
Me: What information, Jeff? You can't tell me which name, all of which I already told you, you want a Social for? See, the thing is Jeff, I know all these socials, so I can give you any of them you want. However, I'm not going to just guess which one because frankly I don't trust you enough to start spitting out random socials that might not be on file. Now, whose social do you want?
Jeff: I can't answer that question.
Me: Alright, Jeff, there are 11 planets in the solar system (based on that Pluto thing and the inclusion of the new planets), I'm thinking of one. Tell me its circumference.
Jeff: I'm sorry?
Me: Answer my question Jeff, or is that too hard because I haven't bothered to tell you which planet I am interested in? Now tell me, which person's social do you want? Robert Mitchener? James Mitchener? Lynn Mitchener? Tell me Jeff. Which one?
Jeff: I can't answer that.
Me: Alright Jeff, I'm going to call back later, and hopefully I'll get to talk to someone who isn't a moron.
--- END ---
I haven't called back. I just can't bring myself to deal with the level of stupid that emanated from that office. I fear that Jeff might have actually infected everyone else at AT&T, and if I call, I could suffer from phone-transmitted-retardation. I'm just going to play it safe and switch to T-Mobile.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
The Dangers of Water Heaters: The Most Troublesome Thing in your Home
Water heaters are used to take cold water, heat it, and then distribute it throughout your home. They provide us with a more comfortable approach to bathing, and a practical method for washing our cloths and dishes that doesn't involve a wood-burning fire and a metal tub full of water hovering above it. We take water heaters for granted, but have you ever stopped to consider just how dangerous these pieces of equipment really are?
Water heaters are essentially giant containers filled with water. Some of them have over 120 gallons of water just stuck inside them, waiting to be released. Some people have their water heaters installed in the garage, which is good. Some don't. Some people have them upstairs in their attics. This is where water heaters become very dangerous. A man can drown in only 3 inches of water. If a 120 gallon water heater were to release its water onto an unsuspecting individual below, that's a lot more than 3 inches. If a man can die in only 3 inches of water, a man will almost certainly die in 120 gallons of water. That's called logical reasoning, and it makes sense.
Water heaters usually heat water through electricity heating or gas heating. Either way, you are in an extremely dangerous situation. If a water heater using gas decides to release some of its gas into your home, and you flick a light switch because you don't know, BOOM! You just exploded. If an electric water heater sparks in an attic, it can immediately ignite all the combustible material up there. By the time you even know you have a fire, your attic is burned to nothing, and the smoke inhalation alone will result in your immediate death.
Going back to the 120 gallons of water thing. A single gallon of water weighs about 8.35lbs. That means that a 120 gallon tank of water weighs 1002lbs. Not to mention the weight of the tank, we'll estimate about 300lbs. That's 1302lbs, sitting above your head, waiting for you to be off your guard. Then, one day, the water heater could just decide it didn't want to be supported in your attic anymore, and boom, down it will fall, straight onto your body, crushing you easier than an elephant can crush a stick insect.
The truth of the situation is that water heaters, though practical, are the most deadly man-made devices in the world. Water heaters kill an average of 18 million people a year. That's more than anything else.
Water heaters are essentially giant containers filled with water. Some of them have over 120 gallons of water just stuck inside them, waiting to be released. Some people have their water heaters installed in the garage, which is good. Some don't. Some people have them upstairs in their attics. This is where water heaters become very dangerous. A man can drown in only 3 inches of water. If a 120 gallon water heater were to release its water onto an unsuspecting individual below, that's a lot more than 3 inches. If a man can die in only 3 inches of water, a man will almost certainly die in 120 gallons of water. That's called logical reasoning, and it makes sense.
Water heaters usually heat water through electricity heating or gas heating. Either way, you are in an extremely dangerous situation. If a water heater using gas decides to release some of its gas into your home, and you flick a light switch because you don't know, BOOM! You just exploded. If an electric water heater sparks in an attic, it can immediately ignite all the combustible material up there. By the time you even know you have a fire, your attic is burned to nothing, and the smoke inhalation alone will result in your immediate death.
Going back to the 120 gallons of water thing. A single gallon of water weighs about 8.35lbs. That means that a 120 gallon tank of water weighs 1002lbs. Not to mention the weight of the tank, we'll estimate about 300lbs. That's 1302lbs, sitting above your head, waiting for you to be off your guard. Then, one day, the water heater could just decide it didn't want to be supported in your attic anymore, and boom, down it will fall, straight onto your body, crushing you easier than an elephant can crush a stick insect.
The truth of the situation is that water heaters, though practical, are the most deadly man-made devices in the world. Water heaters kill an average of 18 million people a year. That's more than anything else.
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